I Want It All

On September 18, 2007 Randy Pausch gave what would be his final lecture to his computer science students at Carnegie Mellon University. Randy was diagnosed with terminal cancer and died in July of this year, however his farewell address has been much publicized and even made into a bestselling book. In recalling one teaching job, Randy said that his students surprised him:

"I had been a professor for a decade at that point, and when I started BVW, I didn’t know what to expect. I gave the first two-week assignment, and ended up being overwhelmed by the results. I didn’t know what to do next. I was so at sea that I called my mentor, Andy can Dam.

‘Andy, I just gave my students a two-week assignment and they came back and did stuff that, had I given them an entire semester to complete it, I would have given them all A’s. What do I do?’

Andy thought for a minute and said: ‘OK. Here’s what you do. Go back into class tomorrow, look them in the eyes and say, ‘Guys, that was pretty good, but I know you can do better.’’

His answer left me stupefied. But I followed his advice and it turned out to be exactly right. He was telling me I obviously didn’t know how high the bar should be, and I’d only do them a disservice by putting it anywhere.” (The Last Lecture, p.122-123)

Randy learned a lesson that day about potential and how it can be stifled when individuals do not recognize it.

We all have the ability to do great things, but when the bar is set too low we often jump only high enough to clear those low expectations. Nowhere is this truer than in our relationships. In Genesis 2:18, God makes the observation that “it is not good for man to be alone.” While this statement specifically refers to Eve, it also tells us something about human nature. Both men and women were created for relationships, but for some reason we often seek only the minimum benefit from the people with whom God has surrounded us. Perhaps we are shy or scared. Maybe our culture prevents us from discussing things beyond pleasantries because certain subjects are not meant for “proper conversation.” It could be that we simply do not appreciate the blessings which God desires to pour out upon us through our friends and family.

The New Testament is full of admonitions about doing the things that promote healthy Christian relationships. The Hebrews writer asks how we can make our love and good deeds increase and then explains that we do so by spending time together (Heb. 10:24-25). James advises to confess our sins to one another, not because we need to get things off our chests, but so that we can pray for each other and be healed (James 5:16). Paul explains that differences can be healthy in a relationship when he says that members of the church are like parts of a body…all different, but all necessary. Where one person is weak another will be strong (1 Cor. 12). As we look at the relationships in our lives, romantic and platonic, let us strive to get everything out of them that God intended.